What questions should I ask a marriage celebrant during our first meeting?
The very best thing you can do at the start of your planning is to reach out and organise a face to face meeting or an online chat over Zoom or FaceTime before you make the final decision on who you like to be there, supporting you on your wedding day. I always say to my couples that I hope we will create a relationship that becomes so natural, it becomes a friendship. Trust and communication are so important as you share so much of your story with me, and visa versa.
So start by reaching out to one or five celebrants on your short list and set up a time to meet either face to face or online.
Our first meeting is more like speed dating, but without the buzzer and time restraints! I really want us to feel comfortable just chatting without it feeling like a job interview. I’m very relaxed, but curious. Conversations about your love may be the easiest talk you’ll ever have. The chance to look back on special memories is very powerful and emotive.
The code of conduct issued by The Attorney General department in Australia requires me to keep all of your private, personal information private and I always do. Don’t worry you won’t ever read about yourselves on a local wedding forum or the Daily Mail!
I love to free flow our conversation during our first meeting because I really want to know about you first and foremost. Hopefully you’ll feel comfortable asking me some questions too.
Write a list of the questions that you’d like answered; here are some examples of questions I am asked most frequently during our first meeting:
- How long have you been a celebrant for? (10 years)
- What was the most unique wedding you’ve been a part of? (hard question?!…maybe the Game of Thrones themed one in 2018)
- Are you flexible on ideas and inclusions, and do you have any ideas to help guide our thoughts. (yes absolutely)
- Are you inclusive of all couples? (always)
- If you’re sick or unable to be there on our wedding day, do you have a back up in place (I belong to several celebrant groups who always help each other when needed)
- Where do you stand during the ceremony (To the side, or in the middle, beside your crew, wherever you’d like me to go)
- What time will you arrive? When do you leave (at least 45 mins before go time and I leave when it feels right to go)
- Can I pay full fee upfront or are you flexible with a payment plan (yes to both)
- Will you take care of all the legalities? first document to complete is called ‘Notice of Intended marriage’
- What do we do when we’re married? F.A.Q
- Do you have your own PA & microphone (yes I sure do)
- Do you control the music, or should we arrange for someone to do this (I’m always happy to control the tunes)
- Do you write each ceremony from scratch? or do you use a basic template (From scratch! everyone has their own unique story)
- Do we really need to do a rehearsal (definitely not. It’s so special to just be in the moment on your day. But I’m always happy to do one if it makes you feel better prepared)
- What name do I use when I sign the marriage certificates on the wedding day (Your name as it is today)
- Have you worked at my venue before? If yes, do you have any tips to help the day run smoothly
- Can you come and see me/us before we walk down the aisle? (I love doing this, it’s a must do)
- Will you help us to write our vows (Yes! I have some great tips and easy to follow dot points to get you started)
- What are your terms and conditions (we are living in COVID times so make sure this question is the top of your list! I send you my T&C’s when booking)
- What happens if our plans are interrupted by COVID? cancellations, postponements etc (see above)
Most of these questions come out during our chats but it can be good to have a list of things that are really important to you so you don’t forget to ask x